Bethenny Ever After Season 3 Week 11: Fair Thee Well Heeled

One Sentence Summary:  Good bye Julie, hello new digs!

Can’t Sleep.  Clowns Will Eat Me

Melissa’s Thoughts:

It’s Julie’s final episode and a fitting way to end the season.  For this reason alone I will only select photos of Bethenny or the crew crying in tribute to Julie Plake for her years of service.  I’m all hopped up on my Memorial Day Twisted Teas and ready to send Julie off with a proper Cheers – She’s a hometown girl, gotta represent the ‘Burgh!!  I know a bunch of you are looking for Julie Plake’s salary, and I wish I could help you, but that’s more secretive than a Freemason’s meeting.  BUT, since you’re here, have a read and a chuckle… On us.

Holiday Party

I’m so going to make you cry this entire episode.

The crew heads to Tortilla Flats for Julie’s last Holiday party.  Dwayne suggests Nick should come for the party because really, it ain’t a party until Nick arrives, and it’s time to let loose and celebrate.  You know when the booze is involved the tears will start flowing and I’m wringing my hands in anticipation muttering muwahahahas.  Jason finally joins the party still having worried thoughts of joining Bethenny’s team.  Dwayne, in proper drunken fashion, starts the “I love you” tributes to the table.  Aw, now it’s a party!!

Glamour Time – Tears Included

Yep, just going to hug you every day so you cry.

It’s Julie’s last photo shoot with Bethenny for her monthly Glamour magazine column.  Bethenny says it’s hitting her that Julie is leaving.  Really Bethenny, isn’t it hitting you every week that she’s leaving?  I almost want to drive Julie out to Pittsburgh myself just to get it over with.  Of course wanting to make sure we reach full-on tears, Julie brings out the iPad to make sure Bethenny’s tears start flowing.  Heehee, that’s right Julie.  Give the make-up artists some extra work today.  Again, conversation turns to Julie’s help building the empire… and more tears.

Therapy

No, this is my “Things are going well, I’m happy” face.

Bethenny has no idea what’s going on in her life and everything is up in the air.  Isn’t that every week at therapy with B?  Between the renovation, a tumultuous relationship and everything else that is happening, she’s all over the place.  I’ll admit, I zoned out like I usually do when Bethenny and Dr. A get started, but I think there was a point where he suggested that relationships are the most challenging thing in her life, but she’s working on it.

Work-Appropriate Nipples

It’s my business and I have a No Bras Monday policy

Julie shows up for her last day at Skinnygirl and Bethenny thinks they are all ready because they have been building up to it for a while.  Unfortunately, Jason can’t focus on anything other than Bethenny’s nipples.  No one else ever looks or notices her nipples so Jason really shouldn’t.  There’s some good logic there, Bethenny.  In the pile of holiday cards mixed in with all the family stuff is one from Ellen and Portia.  Jason finds it a bit surreal.  Um, wake up and smell the Skinnygirl, my dear… You’ve hit the big leagues.  Bethenny sneaks off to chat with her publicist because she hasn’t shared her “big news” with everyone.  The Big News?  She calls everyone in to tell them (drum roll please)… Bethenny got her own talk show in LA.  She thanks everyone for their support, but needs Jason and the rest of the team to agree to move to LA to shoot the show.  She promises no one will be out of a job, but I’m thinking if they can’t step up she’ll find someone who can.

Good Bye Julie

I swear this is going to be the last cry… swear!

Julie has her going away cake with the crew, and while she’s going to miss everyone, she shares with Bethenny how she’s changed her life. (Oh, look another montage, but at least there are tears.)  Bethenny shares how much Julie has changed her life as well.  And just like that she’s gone.

Shopping Isn’t For Everyone

Shopping for furniture, Bethenny lets Bryn run rampant in the store.  Gotta say, I’m the woman in the store giving the fish eye to any parent who allows her child to run amok while I’m trying to shop.

Fast Forward 3 Months

Before the movers get here, where are the “goodie boxes”?

Huh, what?  Can they just do that??  It’s the last day in the old place and Bethenny and Jason have a quiet moment thinking about how her life has changed and how that change affects the rest of the family.  Bethenny and Jason see it as a fresh start to get rid of everything they don’t need.  Bethenny has been slowly moving their things ahead of the movers but now is having panic attacks wondering where Jason’s porn stash and her “goodie box” are.  She says the final good-bye to the office and another chance to reminisce about what she accomplished in such a tiny space.

It’s Official!

If you ever walk by this bar without paying proper respect, consider yourself kicked to the curb.

Bethenny has been keeping Jason from the apartment so he can have a full reveal along with the rest of us.  WOW, what an amazing place.  They decide that while it was a touch-and-go year, they built something amazing for Bryn to grow up in.  The Million Dollar Dream Team comes in to get the final thumbs up from Bethenny and Jason.  OK, I’m loving Bethenny’s closet… Well, let me clarify, I want the shoe wall in her closet!!

Morning After

I can not believe I managed avoid having sex with you to christen the house last night!!

After their first night in their new digs, Jason feels the sense of calm and good.  Their first phone call in the new place is Hillary, who produces the Ellen show, telling her that Bethenny’s show will premier June 11th.  Now they get to pack up again and head out to new digs in LA.  Maybe it’s a good thing sine Bethenny and Jason realize they aren’t “these people” after Bryn pulls over the vase of flowers.

Bottom Line:

As far as Bethenny seasons go, that was pretty damn tame.  Thanks for the kiddie roller coaster and ready-to-drink beverages Bethenny.  We’ll be looking for your talk show!

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