America’s Next Top Model British Invasion – Week 7, Estelle

Nigel and The Jays in happier days. – From zap2it.com

I’m having a hard time watching this week after the announcement that Nigel and the Jays got fired from the show.  Tyra says it was a network decision, but are we really supposed to believe that Ty Ty doesn’t have the power to say no.  I know the ratings have been in the toilet for the last few seasons, but  let’s be honest, the reason this show has been on the downturn has more to do with Tyra’s crazy shenanigans then Nigel or the Jays.  I mean once upon a time this show really felt like a high-end modeling competition.  Now, it’s a manufactured reality show that relies on gimmicks (a whole season of short girls) and indulging Tyra’s ridiculous vanity projects.  I mean is there anyone out there that isn’t laughing at her giving these girls “Intoxibella” names like the models in her novel?  Come on, Tyra, your boys aren’t the problem here.  You know it and I know it.  Anywho, we have a season to finish…

At the house, Kyle & Seymone have formed an alliance since they’re the two girls getting ganged up on and they both love potato salad.  Laura is still pissed that Kyle stayed over Azmarie, as I think most of us are.  Well, at least I am, though I don’t see it as Kyle vs. Az.  Seems the rest of the house is ready for Kyle to go home.  Since this is the lead-off scene, I assume the theme this week is anti-Kyle.

Time for today’s team challenge – Nigel tells the girls that they’re going to be filming a PSA for Tyra’s B.I.O. Campaign.  BTW, B.I.O. stands for Beauty Inside and Out… would have been nice to know that.  I looked it up.  Anyway, it has to be two minutes long and talk about anti-bullying.  OK, see now I can get behind putting bullies on alert.  This kind of Tyra indulgence is fine.  It’s good.  It makes sense.  Each team will have 4 young girls that the models will have to incorporate into the film.  The winning PSA will be featured on cwtv.com and they will receive a personal video message from home on their Virgin mobile phones.

Eboni (and yes, I just realized that I’ve spelled her name wrong the entire season) tells the girls how she was bullied her whole life for being black and poor.  She’s even had chocolate milk thrown at her.  Ugh, children can be so cruel.  I just don’t get how racism still exists, but it’s real and it’s getting worse every day it seem…. but that’s for another blog.  After they paint their backdrops, they meet the little girls with whom they’re paired.  One of the girls talks about how she was bullied and says that she didn’t let them get to her because your inner beauty can’t get bullied.  That’s so sweet.  Love that.  Another girl feels ugly because of the color of her skin.  All the pretty princesses have different skin and hair than she does.  This is totally breaking my heart.  I just want to hug all these little girls.

The Brits and their girls tell us that beauty is inside each of us.

Nigel liked both teams’ PSAs but felt the Americans lacked some familiarity; that the models didn’t really get to know their girls.  The Brits, on the other hand, were really well rehearsed but it was a little forced.  It becomes less authentic when you’re not natural.  However it was natural enough for them to win and get messages from home on the Virgin Mobile phone.  Everyone is loving their messages except for Sophie, whose message from her boyfriend was essentially a weather report.  Wamp wamp.

The girls show up at a BelAir mansion for their photo shoot,  where they’re going to be art installations at a dinner party… aaaaand they’re going to have to bring their best booty tooches to their poses.  See, this is why this show is on the downward trend.  Booty tooches and superhero names over high fashion and interesting shoots…. but I digress.  They’re going to have a special guest in their photo with them, singer Estelle, who has made the difficult transition from the UK to the US.  Like me some Estelle.  She’s awesome.  Now I’m gonna have “American Boy” in my head all day.  Eh, there are worse songs to be stuck singing all day.

Anywho, the girls have to pose as the centerpiece at a dinner party hosted by Estelle while the other models pose as dinner guests.  Time to outshine your teammates.  The girls aren’t having the easiest time bringing much of anything interesting to the table.  That is until Sophie shows up and really brings the decadence.  Seymone did a great job too and even got a chance to shove some pie

Seymone takes “pie in your face” literally.

in her competition’s face.  Kyle gets a butt pad because she has no booty to tooch.  And that is somehow annoying to Laura.  It’s not fair because she was given a tooch advantage.  Oh please shut up already.  I’m exhausted by your whining.  You can be “winey” but you can’t be “whiney” up in here.  Learn it. Know it.  Live it.

Woo, Tyra.  That dress is so not flattering on you.  I know you’re all about the mermaid dress this season, which is a big step-up from the jumpsuit season, but that dress is not cute.  On you.  But it’s time to discuss the booty tooch photo shoot.  See, even panel is making fun of the fact that they’re discussing the art of the tooch.  Seriously, if Tyra is laughing at it (and it’s her stupid invention), we’ve gone too far.

Catherine’s photo was ok.  Aleisha looks like she has a tooch-ache.  She’s not committed enough.  Sophie has really learned the smize.  Kelly thinks her photo looks like Ivana Trump’s divorce party.  It’s dirty, it’s sexy, it’s great.  Nigel thinks Annaliese’s shot is the best for her of the season.  Estelle says she upped the ante for everyone else.  Eboni’s picture would stop Nigel if he saw it in a magazine.  Tyra thinks it’s great and she stayed sweet and young.  Kyle’s shot isn’t amazing in body but good in the face, though they’ve seen this face a lot.  Estelle says Kyle wasn’t aware of what was going on around her.  Kelly thinks she’s going downhill.  Nigel doesn’t love how extreme Laura’s body positioning is.  Tyra likes it and thinks the angles are interesting.  Seymone is up last.  Kelly really loves the shot.  Tyra says she’s like a rainbow.  Like an upside down rainbow tooch.  Hey Tyra, here’s my upside down eye rainbow eye roll.

Sophie’s Photo of The Week

Best Photo:  Sophie

Bottom Two:  Kyle & Aleisha

Kyle is going home and now the girls will have to find someone else to pick on.  Watch out, Seymone.

Bottom Line:

All I keep thinking at this point is that I hope they go somewhere foreign soon so at least I have interesting scenery to watch.

Photos from cwtv.com
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