Bethenny Ever After Season 3 Week 6: All Da Boats

One Sentence Summary:  Bethenny fights the tabloid stories the only way she knows how… On television.

Oh, I'm going to need to put these back in my purse.

Melissa’s Thoughts:

B is going to take it to the streets or rather the talk shows to crush the rumors about her… Defending her Forbes article and the lost at sea story.  Yes Bethenny, that’s why they say ‘be careful what you wish for’.

Haters gonna Hate

The cover of Forbes... Opens a new threshold to torment for B.

Bethenny and Jason break down the weekly attacks on Bethenny in the press.  Oh hey folks, Bethenny is pregnant again, and it’s not Jason’s it’s Hugh Grant’s.  DAMN B that’s a good one, let’s hope that goes viral!!  She thinks the cause of it all is the money aspect, the tabloids didn’t care until she started making money, but her shot to defend herself is a talk show junket.  That’s it, she’ll get to clear the air and promote her new pilot she developed.  Say what?? Why have I not heard of said pilot?

Who doesn’t love a Bidet?

Finally, I'll have my own bidet!!

In the car Bethenny and Dwayne are off to Waterworks to pick out fixtures and flooring for the bathroom.  Dwayne respects her “gangsta”, especially since sister is doing it for herself in the business world.  If she was a nobody she wouldn’t be in the paper… that’s right Dwayne, preach it… Haters gonna hate.  Finally at Waterworks, Bethenny is impressed by Brook’s ensemble and new attitude around her.  But all is lost once she spies her favorite bathroom appliance… The bidet.  Bethenny, I swear you love a bidet, I think at least once a season you’re marveling about one.  Granted, I’m all for the refreshing aspects of a bidet, but I like to subtly appreciate the lady toilet.


Our favorite food blogger Nick stops by to talk balls... falafel balls people... come on!!

Bethenny’s Food Blogger Nick Feitel stops by to share his latest falafel blog and it’s drinks all around for the reading.  The working title options are “A fist full of of balls” or “For a few falafels more”.  Shocking, the fist full of balls is a bit aggressive for Bethenny – maybe option 2.  Really, I would have loved to go on the falafel date with these two.  I’ll be honest, I want to go on a food date with Nick.  I’m loving that article, and it made me search out a few others… I like your style Nick!!  The Winey Bitches would love to go food hunting with you!  I digress, talk turns to Bethenny’s beverages and she thinks she should name a new one “the panty dropper”.  Maybe it will be a vodka that I’d like… Though I’m sure it would end up in my refrigerator next to the rest of B’s beverages.  One of these days I’m going to have a Skinnygirl party and taste test them with all my friends, maybe I’m just too fussy… I don’t care for margaritas, I’m a sangria snob… Maybe I’m over judging Skinnygirl.  Who’s with me on another tasting??

Therapy – the behind the scenes of Bethenny

Can't sleep, the clowns will eat me.

Once again we visit Dr. Amador’s office gain insight into B’s life that we don’t see on camera.  Seems the person who towed them in said they were never lost at sea and she made it all up.  Bethenny has settled her pace a bit, but the good doctor wonders why she keeps wanting to go and do more.  Her thought is that she’s a workaholic based on her life’s struggles recalling times in her old apartment single, broke and depressed.

Bloggers and Tabloid Hell

I'm so distracted by the tabloids I'm eating Bryn's baby food - I can't even tell you.

Back at B’s place she can’t stop looking at the online tabloids.  She’s lied about the boat, cocktails and everything else – according to them.  What is she eating, a plate of sweet potato?  Sorry, she’s getting pissed and wants to go after everyone who has lied about her, now if only she had a venue to voice her opinion…

Meanwhile on Today…

Hey Matt, when do I get so see Robin? Oh, wrong show, my bad.

Bethenny makes the trip to the Today Show (why not GMA Bethenny??  Those are my peeps) to clear the air about all the gossip.  Hmmm, that was a bit understated if you ask me.  I guess there was some serious editing that I hardly saw the point.  See Bethenny, GMA would have done an awesome interview.  Over dinner B informs Jason she won the battle and the bloggers had to recant their stories about her financial status.  She can’t help but point out Jason has groomed for the occasion and no my friends, not his facial hair.  Though she’s not sure she likes his face beard much, the ball shaving caught her off guard.  OK, I don’t know about the rest of you, but I’m starting to feel a little dirty with the way Jason is mentally humping his wife at the table.  I’m all for couples being attracted to each other, but not to the point that it’s uncomfortable to those around you.  And by around you I mean your Bravo viewers.  Talk turns to their Mexico trip on which her birthday falls and we all remember the debacle that was her last birthday, so obviously Jason is a bit unsure how to “celebrate”.

Can we get a seat for my suitcases?

Let's just pack everything and I'll need part of your suitcase too.

Bethenny gets ready for her trip to her Ellen appearance.  She tries on her “flying outfit” just to make sure it’s a good outfit.  Mid getting ready to leave Bethenny has a mini moment to call Jason and say she didn’t like their good bye (short-quick good bye).  No offense Bethenny, but maybe the guy had to get to work.

Take it down B

Can't stop singing Sledgehammer

Bethenny takes out her anger at all the negative aspects of her life to take down a wall in the apartment for her dream closet… And she likes it.

Ellen… ’nuff said

What are you talking about?? Please try to make sense on the stage OK?

Bethenny wakes in LA to plan her session on the Ellen show.  Dawa still isn’t overly talkative with Bethenny, but she has no worries holding her tongue when it comes to free Tibet protests and it boggles Bethenny’s mind.  In the car Bethenny talks about how badly she wanted to appear on Ellen – personally I’d love to be on Ellen too, or at least hang with her.  She seems at home with the whole staff, and I kind of want to hang with these people.  Ellen and Bethenny break down Bryn’s ability to talk and of course Ellen goes “Ellen” and you can’t help love her.  Really Ellen, I can totally speak for my partner in saying the Winey Bitches love you.

Bottom Line:

Any show with Ellen makes my day.  Now I think the Two Winey Bitches should be on Ellen… PLEASE ELLEN!!!  PLEASE!!


One response to “Bethenny Ever After Season 3 Week 6: All Da Boats

  1. Jason if I were you I would get out now.I am a Scorpio and thought I loved Bethanny,but she is impossible.Way too self centered I would love a guy like you,she is trying to make you a ass kisser. Well just leave while you can she is someone who you cannot satisfy if I had her life I would be in heaven not the hell she likes.Cathy from LI NY

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