One Sentence Summary: The powers that be decide to recap Season 1 for us a week before the Season 2 Finale for some unknown reason.
Rachel: Say what? I thought tonight was the finale? What the hell is going on? I mean I’m all for a behind the scenes show or a recap if it went on hiatus but one week before the finale? I would have loved to have been in the meeting where this was discussed. Hey, let’s squeeze another week’s worth of advertising out of this show. No one will mind. I’d also like to have been in the meeting when they chose the VO talent. I’m not sure I can handle an hour of her talking to me like she’s trying to get me into bed. I mean I know I’m a hot piece of property, but I’m not that easy…. no matter what you read on a bathroom wall. But bless her heart, I’m sure she was just doing her job…
Anyway, I’m not sure how much there is to discuss here since it seems that there isn’t even footage from Season 2 in this “behind the scenes” look. Well, that makes it even more fascinating. We’re getting a peak behind the scenes of last season and none of this season. OK, on what planet does this make sense? I mean, color me crazy, but I’m pretty sure I’m all good with last season. Have moved on. Enjoyed my time and all…
So let’s see, what we have…
Whitney and her porn star boobs. Boring.
Whitney and her c-word tattoo. Lame.
Whitney with her pink gun and the safety off at the country club. Shoot me.
We do get to revisit Leslie telling everyone about her creating her real estate empire off of her modeling earnings. That and her splurging on a beige Ferrari… That was a funny one. No one believes any of that is true, but Pam is most disturbed by the fact that there are no beige Ferraris. Sorry Pam, but there actually are beige Ferraris. I looked it up. Though I still don’t think Leslie had one.
We also get to revisit Leslie preying on AJ, the baby golf pro. Oh how exciting, we get to see Leslie and AJ flirt and then make out. I mean I don’t blame her. He’s easy on the eyes. But I could have lived another
40 er, I mean, 30 years without seeing that.
The one thing I don’t mind having to sit through again are some Pam’s classic one-liners like the one she dropped on Bonnie and her disco ball of a dress, “I don’t know whether to greet you or dance under you.” Ah, I raise my wine glass to you, Pam. That was a good one.
Wait, did the S&M VO lady just say that the club is “ripe” with opportunity. Uh, the expression is “rife with opportunity” not “ripe”. Where is Bonnie’s PhD when you need it?
Blah blah blah… Kalyn’s mom…. blah blah blah… Leslie and Connie’s ex… blah blah blah… Maddie quitting Leslie’s pageant classe. Snooze…
Hold the phone…. Do I remember the Kalyn-Tyler things from last year? No… I do not. I remember Kalyn & Whitney fighting but I don’t remember it being over Tyler. Granted, my shelf life for reality show details is pretty much as long as it takes to hit “Publish” on this blog, but I’m thinking this little gem was not shared with us. Whoa whoa whoa… Kalyn just said Tyler will choose her over Whitney. So that was her goal from jump. Interesting… you horny little toad.
Though can we really be surprised by anything Kalyn might be doing seeing as how her mother and her godmother are both hideous influences in her life. I mean, Kalyn’s mom competing with her in the pageant last year was OOC; especially when she came home and shoved it in her face. Way to be a role model. No wonder this kid finds love at the bottom of a cupcake wrapper.
But that’s about all we’re treated to tonight… There’s not a single frame or mention of Season 2. Nope, just a random time suck thrown at us by the executives at the Style Channel. I mean I know that there are usually reruns during a big event like the Super Bowl or the Oscars, but this one’s a real head scratcher. Anyway, there you have it. A big fat nothing…
See you next week for the Season 2 Finale… I think.