Category Archives: Housewives

One Sentence Summary:  The tug-o-war over Tamra’s BFF-ness continues South of The Border.

The JewBu ones don’t look like that!

My Thoughts:

Rachel:  Oh boy, I am scared to watch tonight’s episode.  Not only do we have our usual parade of bad behavior, but we’re mixing in tequila, strippers and penis-shaped party favors.  I’m pretty sure that is the recipe for a disaster.  A blinding, mind-numbing disaster.  Throw in some Gretchen whining and Vicki woohoo-ing and I’m not sure there’s enough wine in the world to make this tolerable.  Not to mention that I’m on the wagon for the next two weeks.  Yeah, that’s right.  Even a Winey Bitch needs a break every now and again.  In this case, I’m preparing myself for a weekend in Key West where the four basic food groups are:  liquor, beer, wine and late-night pizza.  But I may just need a little nip from the bottle tonight.  Just a small one…

Andale!

Gretchen & Heather who?

Rachel:  We rejoin the trio partying down the road, wondering where Heather & Gretchen are.  Um, in the limo wondering where you are.  But that question is quickly forgotten as they enter Andale’s and jump up on the bar for some Coyote Ugly dancing.  Now we play the compare/contrast game as we go back & forth Continue reading →

One Sentence Summary:  It’s bachelorette party time, but not everyone is whooping it up.

I do not wear too much make-up! I wear the recommended weekly allowance… daily.

My Thoughts:

Rachel:  Yep, I fully blew off last week.  I watched it.  I think.  No, I did.  I just never managed to put my thoughts on paper… or Internet as the case may be.  I can’t say why other than I’m already bored of these ladies.  They need a cast shake-up.  The most interesting thing about Lydia is her mom… whom I love, but I’m not feeling a great surge of excitement with her addition.  And I expected more from the return of Lauri.  But she was a big flatline too.  Maybe this week, when she gives Gretchen the 411 on Vicki’s past dalliances with partners of the female persuasion, we’ll get some juice from these dried-up oranges.  I’d rather have Jeanna back, personally.  She’s a guaranteed good time.  OK, let’s see what these ladies have for us this week.  Maybe this foreshadowing of a kinder, gentler Tamra will come true.  HA HA HA HA… yeah, I just heard that in my head.

An Offer You Can’t Refuse

In the role of Alexis’s gatekeeper: Lydia.

Rachel:  So here’s a random thought:  I never cut up cheese for my guests.  I serve the block uncut.  I just think it’s nicer for someone to cut the piece they want.  Is there an etiquette rule on that?  Well, I’m sure Tamra knows the carb count for each piece of cheese that gets slathered with that jam she’s serving along side.  But that’s not why we’re here.  Wait, why are we here? Continue reading →