Vanderpump Rules – Episode 5 I’m not a Bitch – in 100 or less

Melissa’s Thoughts:

running low on friends Stassi stoops to a photo op with Scheana

Running low on friends, Stassi stoops to a photo-op with Scheana.

Ugh, we’re back with the SUR kiddies… And I use that term loosely as I don’t want to offend any children with a comparison.  So this week is the aftermath of Vegas and Stassi’s return to being a bitch on Cali soil.    Also, I feel I need to warn you that I’ll be away next week and don’t know when I’ll get to the write up.  So since I’m abandoning you all next week and I’m feeling guilty, I’ll give you an extra 100 tonight.  Cheers!

200 or less

Lisa is planning another tea party, and she’s not cool with the Vegas street fight.  Jax dances to keep his job then cries for Stassi.  Stassi and mom, Dayna, lunch and dish Vegas… oops, mom’s not cool with the Frank sleepover.  Scheana is opening for Tina (another SUR waitress).  Peter asks Jax about him hooking up with Laura-Leigh (SUR waitress), an ex-meth addict, but it’s great sex.  Stassi has no one on her side – poor girl.  Lisa calls shenanigans on Jax shagging L-L.  Stassi wants the night off to not see Jax and L-L.  Kristen has a party without Stassi so everyone has a good time.  L-L shares Stassi’s evil texts.  Lisa holds a company sit-down and calls Stassi a ghetto bitch – heehee.  Stassi brings in the B team and goes to Scheana’s performance – because she’s evil.  Scheana’s outfit isn’t going to reduce Stassi’s mocking.  Poor Stassi is left snarkless, that’s gotta suck.  After some tears Stassi lures Scheana in to consume her soul.  No, I joke (but not really).  Make sure you save that “new friendship” photo for when she’s mocking you next week Scheana.

Bottom Line:  

Ugh, I have to say I’m a little thrilled I’ll not have to watch Stassi’s nightmare behavior while I’m away.  I really don’t get how one person can love themselves the way this one does and treat people the way she does.  You’re an evil little twit my dear.

Photo:  bravo.com
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